Monday, March 16, 2009

Oye - Sardar jokes

 Thoda hass lo.

  

A sardar and his wife were going to the city in an auto..
The driver adjusts his mirror

The Sardarji shouted “Are you looking at my wife.

Go and sit behind. I will drive the auto”


============ ========= ========= ==
Ek Sardar puree life sirf ek cheez sochte sochte mar gaya

Mere do bhai hai

Meri sister ke teen bhai kaise

============ ========= ========= ========= ===
Ek Sardar apni sister ke saath bike pe ja raha tha

Kissi ne pucha : Oh Paaji – Girlfriend ke saath kaha ja rahe ho?

Sardar bole “ Girlfriend hogi teri, meri to bahen hai”

============ ========= ========= =
Sardar Indian flag lene shop gaya

Flag dekhkar Sardar kuch bola jise sunkar shopkeeper pareshan ho gaya

Guess who kya bola
“IS MEIN AUR COLOUR  DIKHAO”
==================== ========= ========= =====
Sardar declares:  I will never marry in my life &. . I'll give the same advice to  my children also. . . . .
============ ========= ========= ===
SARDAR  talking on cell.
2ND SARDAR: kis se baat kar raho ho?
1ST: biwi  se.....
2ND: itne... pyar se....?
1ST: tumhari hai. .  .
============ ========= ========= =
A donkey kicked sardar &  ran away
sardar ran to catch the donkey.
He saw a zebra & started beating it & said 'SALA Tracksuit pahan ke dhoka de raha hai'.  
============ ========= ========= ====
SWOT  BOOK filled by Santa Singh

1. Strength: My wife, Jeeto.

2. Weakness: Banta' s wife, Preeto.

3. Opportunity: When Banta is on tour.

4. Threat:When I  am on tour
============ ========= ========= ====
A Sardar  sees a beautiful girl . He goes and kisses her . The girl shouts and  says what r u doing.
Sardar says B COM from KHALSA  college.
============ ========= ========= =====
sardar: Darling, years ago u had a figure like Coke bottle.
Jeeto: Yes darling I still do, only difference is earlier it was 300ml now it's 1.5 ltr.
============ ========= ========= =====
Sardar breaks an egg to make an  omlette.
He finds the egg empty . . . Gets frustrated &
say's 'iski  maaki, aaj kal murgian bhi abortion karati hai!
============ ========= ========= =====
teacher: make a sentence in which 1 word repeated 4 times
sardar: lara dutta marries brian lara and she becomes lara lara
============ ========= ========= =====
how can u identify  a sardar in a classroom?

try

try

think....

very  simple

just see

who is erasing notes when the teacher is erasing the blackboard
============ ========= ========= =====
Teacher: is line ko english me batao, usne apna kaam kiya aur karta hi gaya.
Santa: He done his work  and done dana dan done dana  dan....
============ ========= ========= ====
Lecturer: Write a note on  Gandhi jayanti..??
So..Santa Singh writes 'Gandhi was a great man but maa kasam i dont know who is Jayanti..
============ ========= ========= =====
Santa went to Mysore Palace.
Tourist guide – “Santaji, please dont sit there, it is  Tipu Sultan's chair”
Santa – “Oye don’t worry yaar, I'll get up when he comes!!  
============ ========= ========= =====
Santa: “Banta, yeh  AUTOMATICALLY kya hota hai?
Banta: “Oye tenu eh bhi nahi pata Santa. Jab  auto main koi ganji ladki ja
rahi ho to usse kehte hain  AUTO-ME-TAKLI”
============ ========= ========= =====
Santa: Agar  tumhe kuch ho gaya to mein Pagal ho jaaunga.
Wife: Doosri shaadi to nahin  karogey?
Santa: Pagal ka kya hai, kuch bhi kar sakta  hai
============ ========= ========= =====
What's Ford?
Santa:  Gaadi.
What's Oxford?
Santa: So simple, Bail Gaadi.
============ ========= ========= ====
Why did Santa throw the  butter out of the window?
A: He wanted to see the butterfly!
============ ========= ========= ====
Nurse: Congrats Santa  ji, aap papa ban gaye.
Santa: Meri wife ko nahi bolna mein use surprise dunga!
============ ========= ========= =====
Banta ek sadhu se bola: Baba, meri biwi bahut pareshan karti hai, koi  upay batao.
Sadhu: Beta, upaay hota to main sadhu kyun banta?  
============ ========= ========= ====
 

 

 

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